FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS: THE ANSWERS

1 Yes.
2 No.
3 Every day.
4 Spare spectacles, too much change, credit card, debit card, library ticket, library books, my Homebase discount card, receipts, satellite phone, multi-band short wave radio, two-litre water bottle, water purification tablets, Maglite, waterproof matches, whistle, gill net, candles, large metallic foil bag, Leatherman multi-purpose tool, plasters, antihistamines, sterile dressings and gauze, Vaseline, suturing needles, anti-diarrhoea pills, tetracycline, a hexamine block, a chequered handle picnic knife, an extra-expanding calf-skin gusset purse, some choice-blended China tea in willow pattern enamelled tins, a solid ivory fitted Russian leather dressing case with tortoiseshell comb and toilet requisites, a razor, strop, corkscrew, pencils (H, HB, B, 2B), correspondence cards, mounting solution, prayer book, Bible, Irish linen handkerchiefs, knee shawl, sleeping socks, leather gauntlets, Scotch yarn home-knit jersey, night shirt, Malacca cane, a door wedge, thimble, tape measure, bodkin, sewing needles, 1 card each black and white thread, pearl shirt buttons, linen buttons, safety pins, galvanized iron padlocks, repeater alarm clock, 18-carat gold full hunter, eyelet punch, picture cord, piano wire, tack lifter, table vice, firefly grinder, files for fretwork, skinning knives, skull cap, folding opera hat, life belt, combination knife, fork and spoon set, steering compass, anemometer, rain gauge, portable sketching easel, leather carriage cushion, brushes for water-colour painting, unbleached handmade drawing paper, two bottle travelling ink-stand, fountain pen with 14-carat gold nib, moleskin notebooks, silver hand blotter, ivory paper knife, mortar and pestle, household lubricant, chicken broth, small primus travelling stove, folding stretcher bedstead with spring wire mattress, rabbit’s foot, amulets, small memento mori figurines, smoking equipment, wood bound steel cabin trunk, Banbury cakes, potted meats, half a cooked ham, a tin of mixed biscuits, and some boiled sweets. I don’t get out much.
5 With a pencil.
6 Coffee.
7 Can insufficiencies in a pastry be compensated for by the quantity of the meat?
8 In Sanskrit aesthetics I believe there are said to be 9 feelings that art can excite: wonder, joy, sexual pleasure, pity, anguish, anger, terror, disgust, laughter.
9 A small circle is as infinite as a large circle.
10 Sorry.
11 What’s not to fear? What does Larkin say? ‘Life is first boredom, then fear’.
12 Oh, I don’t know. Off the top of my head: Homer, Aeschylus, Sophocles, Euripides, Aristophanes, Thucydides, Aesop, Ovid, Martial, Augustine, Dante, Boccaccio, Cervantes, Chaucer, Sir Thomas Malory, Sir Thomas More, Spenser, Shakespeare, Donne, Francis Bacon, Robert Burton, Hobbes, John Webster, Middleton and Rowley, Bunyan, Milton, Swift, Samuel Johnson, Defoe, Fielding, Sterne, Montaigne, Rabelais, Rousseau, Erasmus, Goethe, Hugo, Stendhal, Flaubert, Ibsen, Austen, Hazlitt, Dickens, Ruskin, Trollope, George Eliot, Robert Louis Stevenson, Nietzsche, Gogol, Turgenev, Dostoevsky, Tolstoy, Proust, Tristan Tzara, Hardy, Kipling, Beerbohm, Chesterton, Belloc, Conrad, Firbank, Beckett, Henry Green, Evelyn Waugh, Wodehouse, Iris Murdoch, Golding, Mervyn Peake, Orwell, Brecht, Kafka, Thomas Mann, Robert Musil, Walter Benjamin, Joseph Roth, Bulgakov, Pasternak, Knut Hamsun, Bohumil Hrabal, Isaac Bashevis Singer, S.Y. Agnon, Faulkner, Cheever, Philip Roth. They’re all very good.
13 I wish Richmal Crompton had written another.
14 The contemplation of a neatly folded ham sandwich.
15 The OED. Norfolk. Peckham. Auden. The garden. The park. The market. The sea. The swimming pool. The bathroom. Hospital. Church. Synagogue. The gardens and tearooms at Mount Stewart. BBC Radio 1. BBC Radio 2. BBC Radio 3. BBC Radio 4. BBC Radio Ulster. Opera. The Bible. Whitstable. Swings and roundabouts. Romania. Arthur Mee’s Children’s Encyclopaedia. Life’s rich tapestry. Amazon.co.uk. Bangor Public Library, 80 Hamilton Road, Bangor, Co. Down, BT20 4LH. (Hours: Mon, Tue, Wed, Fri, 10.00am – 8.00pm; Sat, 10.00am-1.00pm, 2.00pm-5.00pm).
16 Assassination.
17 Yes.
18 Occasionally.
19 Sometimes.
20 Never.






 
‘When the mind dies’, raves Berryman, ‘it exudes rich critical prose’


Links to interviews: From the Crime Scene NI blog and Crime Always Pays.

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